Choices

I find myself facing a decision. I have to choose one of two ways, really. There is no "continue on" either, it is one way or the other.

Neither way is really "easy" but one way would sure be simpler. However, I know it won't make me happy. But I also know that my other choice would mean that some major changes would have to happen, changes I am not sure I am ready to undertake. I've suddenly realized that I am not where I want to be in life and it is my fault. Granted, I have made some good choices, but bad ones, too. I want to undo the bad before it is too late, but it is scary.

I really don't think there is any way to take the road less traveled without drastic changes, mainly because I am unhappy and unmotivated. I know what I need to do, but I just cannot seem to drag myself to do it. I am so afraid to. I keep pretending like things are going to change, but I know deep down inside they just won't and really I am just making things worse for everyone involved....

I have begun to isolate myself because I don't want to hear everyone else's opinion anymore because I know what they are saying is right. BUT those that have the opposite opinion piss me off more because I know they are wrong and I can't believe that they would want that sort of future for me and my son.

I have to figure this out. But how? It is like ripping the fabric of the universe...